Good Pamphlet - Can You Change If You're Gay?

 

"The opposite of homosexuality isn't heterosexuality -- it's holiness."

What a revolutionary and freeing statement made by David White in his pamphlet addressing the issue Can You Change If You Are Gay?

In this mini-treatise, White stresses the 'holiness' aspect.  Many followers of Jesus Christ do struggle with Same Sex Attraction (SSA) just as many struggle with other forms of sexual activity which God also says is not right in His eyes, such as:   fornication, adultery, incest, etc.

What is a believer, who really does want to please the LORD, to do when strong urges come upon them that does not please Him?

White, who does minister to sexually broken persons, tells us that,

"Obedience [to our Heavenly Father] flows from affection for God..."

This is response from His love for us and can be true for any believer battling against any addiction or sexual activity that He does not sanction.  However, it is so important to note, as White writes, that although our "new hearts" in Christ and "by faith," are "instantaneous",

"...the outworking in our lives is a lifelong process" (p. 10).

This is talking about 'progressive sanctification' and is "lifelong", starting at the point of salvation through Jesus Christ until the day we go to be with Christ.

Ultimately, we need to live to please and glorify the Lord.  Another thing White asserts is,

"God calls us to radical sexual fidelity within marriage because it is intended to mirror our radical spiritual fidelity to Him." (p. 11).

There needs to be self-discipline within a marriage and this takes similar self-discipline and self-denial for the single man or woman and for anyone who wrestles with SSA and wishes not to indulge that which displeases the Lord.

White goes on to explain that whether a person is heterosexual or homosexual, he or she needs to be "Christo-sexual".  That means, we, 

"...submit our desires and affection to Jesus, learning how to manage our bodies 'in holiness'" (p. 12).

This involves much self-denial, as mentioned earlier.  Redemption through Christ, and the "long-suffering" fruit of walking in step with the Holy Spirit are aspects that a believer can engage to help themselves.  They are not doing this alone.  Holy Spirit help and an understanding community of fellow-believers greatly aid the person of SSA or of any other attraction, along the road to maintaining self-discipline in keeping with pleasing the Lord and giving Him glory and honor in our lives, as well as living in holiness.

Does the SSA go away?  

Quite possibly not.  We live in a fallen world and even when a person is a child of God, the attraction to same sex persons can pop up even when least expected or even when unwanted.

The goal is to live by God's grace, in holiness.  There has been some, among White's acquaintances and associations with individuals who struggle with SSA with his ministry who have been able to live in such holiness and to even marry into a heterosexual relationship.  

They often do still need to guard against the SSA.  This would be similar to an alcoholic who had gotten him or herself 'dried out', who would have to guard against, even a drop of alcohol that would set them off again in the wrong direction.

Nevertheless, those of the SSA community who are believers, may be able to live in holy self-denial but could not even think of marrying into the heterosexual marital status.  These all need support with our agape love and even just "plain ole friendship", understanding, patience and compassion.

White stated that,

"The gospel invites [the SAA individual] to come out of hiding because God promises if you trust in him you will never be put to shame." (p. 14).

Much prayer and the support of caring believers need to be in community relationship.  Who among us can be that support?

Another point White makes is that,

"Sex is not the ultimate experience of life" (p. 17).

The apostle Paul remained celibate so he could be more fully engaged in the ministry of bringing the gospel of Jesus Christ to the Gentiles.  He did have many male friends whom He mentored.  Jesus had twelve men who lived in close relationship with Him and even had an inner circle.  This does not mean He had SSA relationships.  Not at all!  There are still good, wholesome friendships among those of our own gender that we can nurture and still keep within God-given boundaries.  This idea was mentioned in this pamphlet.

I know I'm using many quotations here, which is supposed to be a review, not a writing out of the work.  However, White writes so succinctly.  Let's think of this...

"Even if science found genetic (or any other) pre-dispositions to SSA, as they have found with alcoholism and anger, the Bible is our ultimate authority for determining behavior" (p. 24).

Our own free will, placed under God's authority, can, and does, move in the direction that honors Him.  

"Be holy as I am holy,"

says God's Word in 1 Peter 1:16.

God is holy.  Be like Him and keep on, keeping on.

Yes, it is easy to say for those of us who do not struggle with SSA.  Here is something I think would be encouraging for those who do wish to make the changes through living that holy life White suggests, which could apply to any sexual activity that does not honor God, and to any addiction, for that matter.

"Ultimately "change" is the Spirit-led ability to resist and turn from temptation and anyone in Christ can grow along that trajectory" (p.23).

In that there is hope.

                                              ~ERC  December 2020~

Can You Change If You're Gay?; David Write; copyright 2013 by Harvest USA; New Growth Press.