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| Blue Topaz |
Part 7
Sapphire dropped her off at home and Ruth E hurried up the steps and let herself into her parents' home. She could hear her Mother preparing dinner in the kitchen and went straight in, "Mom, oh Mom!" She didn't have to say more, her mother had already heard. "Dad is on his way home from work. He should be here any minute."
"I don't know how we can eat," Ruth E cried. "Sapphire and I were just going to visit him when we heard the Code Blue and saw them all rushing into his room."
Blue Jemmy gave Ruth E a hug and dropped a few of her own tears on Ruth E's shoulder. "Death never gets easier to handle, more so when its one's own loved one. But Grampy lived out a good righteous life and he'll have heard "Well done, good and faithful servant!" the second he arrived on heaven's doorstep. We honor him by continuing to carry his torch."
"Yes, M-m-mom" Ruth E stuttered out between sobs. "I'll go and freshen up upstairs and come and help you."
Roy L IV and his very round wife Blue Diamond (her real name was Diana but as you may have guessed, marriage to a Blue changed that and mostly she was called Blue Di) struggled up the steps into the house with Navy a couple of marches behind. She'd have to hurry down. This was their usual "all-get-together-dinner" night. Again, Ruth E wondered how they would eat.
Ruth E's Dad had come home while she was upstairs so she rushed down to greet him and give a hug of comfort; this was his Dad who'd gone on. Her Dad returned the hug and sat at the table.
Ruth E and her Mom quickly put the finishing touches on their meal and called the others in. Dad gave a tremulous grace thanking God for the already "extended life" of his Dad and for his faithfulness to one and all, especially to his Heavenly Father.
The guys dug into their food as only guys can while Ruth picked at her plate. She listened as her Dad explained some of the rudimentary details of the coming funeral. They would have it on Saturday coming so most of the Blues from far and wide could also be in attendance. She realized she could then go about her deputation work this week albeit with a saddened heart. She'd travel back Saturday morning in time for the 2 pm service; she was thankful she'd set up the nearer-to-home supporters' meetings for these few days.
So with her preparations for her work and thoughts of her Grampy Blue, she'd completely forgotten about Shem's note, that, at first, had been burning a hole in her handbag.
Part 8
It wasn't until the Monday after the funeral when she was getting ready to set out to visit her next group of supporters that she recalled the note. She hurriedly pawed through her bag and located it. She retrieved it and read. Oh so he wished to meet at their old trysting place did he!? NOT! He has something to say does he?! Well, she'd meet him but at the public place of her choosing.
No wonder he'd given her an inquiring look at the funeral. That was supposed to have been last Thursday. Too bad. Now he'll have to wait for 1 1/2 months. She looked at the number he'd given and dialed in on her home phone. Oops, he must be working. She waited for the beep tone and stated her message, "Shem, this is Ruth E, with all the deputation work and the funeral I forgot all about your note til now. So Sorry. I'll be back in 40 days; we can meet at the library at 6 pm on Thursday, 15 next month if you wish. See you then. Bye."
There, that's that. She collected herself and her things and set out in one of her Uncle Garnet and Aunt Violet Blue's many vehicles. She was humming along in her acquired, adopted language; a song of joy and commitment to God, her ever loving, faithful Heavenly Father who never left nor forsook her.
She loved these road trips even though they were at great distances. Sometimes her mother or Sapphire would accompany her but this round was to be a solo journey. That suited her just fine. She could think her own thoughts, ponder, pray, sing aloud and as loud as she wished. It was tiring, exhausting work but she really appreciated the financial support and prayer coverage of all God's people who were her "senders" and despite the obligation to do so, she usually got much pleasure out of meeting everyone again.
Much of her joy stemmed, she realized, from talking about her 'adopted' people and island life. She wondered how they were all doing there. She hadn't heard in several days. Hopefully her substitute was working out well too; that is never easy especially when one doesn't know the language well. But the language of God's love could cover a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8), so to speak, she figured. And so her thoughts swirled in tangents.
Merrily she rolled along, renewing acquaintances in groups, in churches, in individuals' homes. Ruth E comprehended she'd have to canvas for extra support. One of her most staunch supporters had passed away. He'd given almost fifty percent of what she needed for so many years. Alas, his family was not keen on her and felt their Dad was having his money squandered. That hurt. But Ruth E knew that God owned the cattle on the thousand hills (Psalm 50:10) and had wealth in every land. He could sell some of those cattle and help her out. She trusted Him.
If things got really bad she could process the sago; she'd had some of the native women show her how to do that. In fact, that's how many Borneo folks survived during WWII during the Japanese occupation. If they could do it, so could she. She'd rather not though if she could help it as that would mean time away from her intended duties.
She recalled how the children of Israel were supposed to give a tenth of tithes and offerings, some to be burned as sacrifice to God and some to be kept by Aaron and sons and subsequent priests and Levites who were doing the hands-on work of God. This is the story she planned on speaking of at her next stop to help glean some of that 50% deficit back.
She'd expound on what happened to the Levites when Israel rescinded on the giving of those tithes and offerings. God's work could not progress well and even the temple in the promised land had eventually gone into disrepair and the priest and Levites into fields to grow their own food. May God have mercy on the souls of those who are supposed to be senders but who didn't send when they were able to.
Maybe she should only say that last phrase to God.
She'd have to watch it or she'd end up unforgiving and bitter about those things too. And she didn't want to slander anyone either about stinginess or anything. She was not being mercenary but factual. Other missionaries faced similar financial shortfall.
Ruth E recalled reading what Henry W. Wright said in his book Be In Health, A More Excellent Way*1, about these things. How unforgiveness, anger, and bitterness can cause so much trouble with one's health. A lot of autoimmune diseases, he'd said, were caused by these spiritual roots. Not that all those diseases were caused by such, he emphasized, but a remarkably huge number were.
Well, here she was at her destination and what a jolly-crew welcome it appeared to be.
The days whizzed along as she spent pleasant hours with her supporters and friends of yore and making new ones. Soon she turned her car towards home. It would be good to see her folks again and sleep in her own bed.
She dreaded the meeting at the library though.
Part 9
She couldn't put it off any longer. Ruth E called out to her mother, "Mom I have a appointment at 6 to meet someone. Please save me a small plate of dinner. I'll be back when I can. Love ya!"
"Bye, dear," her mother replied.
Ruth E walked to the library arriving with one minute to spare. Shem was just driving up. He waved, smiled and got out of the car as she reached the library stairs. "It's a nice evening," Ruth E said, "Let's go to the park behind the library and stroll about".
Off they went.
Shem began, "Ruth E, thank-you for meeting me. I appreciate it."
Ruth E acknowledged that with a slight nod of her head. She remained silent, waiting for him to speak. He hesitated but then spoke what was on his mind.
"Ruth E, I'm very sorry for what happened in the past. It wasn't fair to you. And you had to hear about my engagement and marriage to Josie through another person. It should have come from me and I regret not having the courage and manners and respect of you to do so."
She nodded again, acknowledging but keeping her eyes on the path before them; not making eye contact. "Let him talk," she told herself.
"It was a mean, underhanded thing to do and I want to ask your forgiveness. Ruth E, will you please forgive me and my bad behavior towards you?
"I forgave you long ago Shem," Ruth E said. "I keep having to forgive you again and again. But God is helping me to make it stick. Yes, I forgive you."
"Thank-you."
Ruth E let down her guard just a smidgen and softened her expression. "Your daughters are very sweet. They each gave me a hug at Grampy Blue's funeral. You've done a great job of raising them thus far. It couldn't have been easy."
"Thank-you. It's been a major challenge but my Mom has been a huge help since Josie left us." Shem said.
He continued, "Ruth E do you think you could ever forgive me enough to consider giving me another chance?"
Even though Ruth E had kind of expected this, she still gasped and felt a surge of anger. But the Holy Spirit seemed to be telling her something, "Remember your prayer? You asked if I was trying to tell you something. Yes, I was. Listen to what this man is saying."
"Please explain yourself Shem," Ruth E asked.
"I feel I've learned more about life and have become more interested in others and less focused on my own interests. Ruth E, I'd like for us to rekindle our relationship. I'm more mature, now, I'd like to think, and with God's help better behaved. Eventually, I'd like a new mother for my girls", Shem finished somewhat hopefully.
"Shem, there are so many other potential mothers and you think of me?!"
"I have my ministry in Borneo which is very fulfilling and blessed by God. You think I could turn away from all of that to be mother to Hannah and Heather? Like you said, your own mother is a big help."
"Blue Belle," Shem whispered, "Please consider. It is not just for the girls' sake; I feel drawn back to you, for yourself".
Then she did turn and look into Shem's eyes. There she saw sincerity. There she saw longing and loneliness. And, her heart skipped a beat, there she saw love for her."
Ruth E cautiously thought, "perhaps." But didn't say that aloud. Instead, she said, "Shem, I was deeply hurt. I have forgiven you but I really don't know if I can manage what you are asking."
"Test his commitment," the Holy Spirit seemed to be prodding. "I still need to do further deputation work; I have to take some further courses with my sending organization and then I'm set to return to Borneo. I want to carry on with this calling I feel led by God to do. However, I will consent to writing to you if you wish but I cannot guarantee any particular outcome. If within the next two years God guides to bring us together, then I will not get into God's Way."
"Two years!?" Shem felt exasperated but didn't show it. He meekly and weakly said, "That's a long time."
In a way, Ruth E felt a bit mean, yet her Holy Spirit guidance was to "test commitment". Two years should do the trick she thought but did inwardly agree with Shem; two years was kind of long.
She also had to admit to herself that her old feelings of fondness were still there and stirring more awake.
~ERC September 2017~
Note:
*1. In regards to the book Be In Health; this is a real resource I have read and Henry W. Wright is really the author. A very good book/manual to read.
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