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| Blue Topaz |
Part 13
Since returning to "the field", Ruth E had been wanting to visit in the village and especially to see her friend Jacey. She'd heard Jacey was very unwell. She could barely walk anymore and many different types of foods seemed to cause her an allergic reaction. She had almost constant headaches and dizziness and needed much sleep.
Jacey had been to the doctors and gone through a whole battery of medical tests, all to which had come out negative.
Ruth E knew Jacey's character tended to hold grudges, stock piling all the things this or that person supposedly committed against her. She continued to harbor a very unforgiving and bitter spirit notwithstanding her new birth in Christ several years ago.
After reading what else Henry W. Wright had to say in his book Be In Health that she'd read during her recent furlough, Ruth E wondered if Jacey's problems stemmed from spiritual roots rather than physical. Seeing that doctors couldn't discover anything major amiss, and that Jacey was still relatively a "spring chicken" at age 45, Ruth E wanted to see if Jacey was open to hearing what she'd learned from author Wright.
Ruth E's organization's policy was that single sisters couldn't go into the rural villages alone, so she had to see which other still single sister, or couple, was available and willing to trudge along with her. She would drive in early Saturday morning and come back Sunday afternoon. Her usual partner was busy so she'd have to find another willing soul. Finally Jacinth, Jacey's twin agreed to accompany Ruth E. She was really worried for her twin and more than willing to help where she could. She promised to stay with Ruth E the whole time, unless Jacey wanted a bit of privacy; they could play it by ear but she'd be only a stone's throw away for the most part.
Along the route to the village, Ruth E explained to Jacinth what she was going to say, asking her to also be praying quietly while she was talking to Jacey.
The village dogs set up the welcome barks, hooting and howling to drown each other out. There was to be no sneaking into this outpost. Jacinth led the way to her family hut, which actually had been semi-modernized what with Jacinth working in town and helping her parents with home improvements so it was quite a cozy setting they entered. They found Jacey home alone resting on the living room sofa. She was very happy to see her sister and Ruth E. She rallied and welcomed them with wide open welcoming arms.
Jacinth had filled Ruth E in on many details but she kind of wanted to hear from Jacey herself as to her medical condition. She knew she'd hear it from beginning to end and even about the many people's misdemeanors towards her. The twins were so different in disposition it was difficult to tell they were sisters if it wasn't for their identical looks. Of course, one should not be comparing...
"Well, let's pray for God's redeeming grace to be activated," Ruth E had said to Jacinth.
Ruth E knew she was no expert on Be In Health but she wanted to recommend some of its aspects anyway. She settled down on the floor beside the sofa and Jacey. "Jacey, I hear you haven't been so well," Ruth E began.
"Yeah and the doctors aren't much good. All they can say about the tests is "negative, negative, negative!" What was the point of even seeking medical help!?" Jacey grumbled.
"Why don't you tell me all about the progression of your affliction, Jacey," Ruth E encouraged.
So she went into a detailed account of this pain and that, and debilitating muscles, etc. "The doc says it's all in my head."
"Jacey, when I was back on furlough I read up on some stuff in this regard. I wonder if you'd let me tell you about it and if you'd be willing to try, well, I'll call it a formula, but the author likely won't like me to use that term, however it's easier to explain that way.
Some of what I'll tell you, you may well not like. Please don't get mad at me. I want you to know that I care about you and what happens to you. I'd like to see you healed....Okay?"
"I'll try," Jacey said hesitantly.
"I'm not sure how to start out so do bare with me Jacey. Jacinth come nearer, I think I'd like to pray first."
"Dear Heavenly Father, we know you love and care about each of us and you want only our well being. You see us here now with Jacey who is rather unwell. Help each of us, with things related to our own spirits and your great Holy Spirit. I ask for wisdom and grace to enter and fill this room and that we will each speak with grace and Your love. I ask in Your Son Jesus' name, Amen."
"Jacey, since all the doctors' testing results have been negative, I believe there has to be some other factor other than a physical root. I discern that there is likely a spiritual root causing the physical problem."
That author guy, Henry W. Wright I was telling you about, says that in many physical ailments there is a high percentage chance of it stemming from a spiritual root.
Your problem appears to be auto immune in nature which Wright would suggest could well be from such things as longstanding and unresolved unforgiveness, anger and bitterness.
Now don't be upset. I want to give you an example from my own life in just this same area. A long time ago someone did something to me (no I won't tell you what) that hurt me very deeply. Very, very deeply, to the core. I could not forgive and was very angry. That anger and unforgiveness turned to bitterness.
God's Word asks us to forgive and to "rid ourselves of every root of bitterness" (Ephesians 4:31). And another verse from Hebrews 12:15 which says, "See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God, that no "root of bitterness" springs up and causes trouble..." (ESV).
Wright suggests that many do not follow God's Word, as above, and then get themselves into trouble; often disease-wise. God created us and knows well what will happen to our health if we don't forgive and relinquish the anger, hurt and bitterness to Him."
"I held onto all that for years. I too started to have similar afflictions as you have now, though not so dramatically. Eventually I did forgive the person and grew better. Yes, I still struggle at times, but my Heavenly Father helps me again, and again."
"On furlough I happened to bump into that person and all the old feelings of anger, etc resurfaced. God had to point out that I needed to forgive again. It's kind of like an onion, where there are layers of skin wrapping, etc that need to be peeled away a layer at a time. Keep peeling till those negative feelings are gone; again and again."
"My point in telling you all this Jacey is that I do know you, and that you have a decided tendency to keep records of peoples' wrongs or supposed wrongs, against you. First Corinthians 13:5 says that one of the characteristics of love is that "Love keeps no record of wrongs".
Jacey I believe that you do keep such a record and need to give that list up to God, one person and their wrongs against you at a time. Forgive them everyone. I know it can be a painful task and hit at one's pride too. These are part of God's New Testament commands for us for Christian living and are needful for us. I will not guarantee improved health if you do so, but it would be well worth a try. However, don't let your motivation be for good health; rather for obedience to God and out of love, respect and gratitude for Him."
"Would you be willing to do that Jacey?"
"Let God's love infuse you. Let the grace of God 'activate' you. Let obedience to God also put you into action."
"I'm going to be quiet a bit and let you think. Think of what you want to do. Do you want to hang on to all those negative things (you see the doctors' tests were somewhat accurate--they kept saying, "negative, negative"). Anyway, think if you want to obey God. Or if you want to keep on in negative, unwholesome mindset towards whomever. I'll pray silently and so will Jacinth. Let us know what you decide."
Silence entered the living room. The outdoor sounds were even muted on this balmy afternoon. Jacinth and Ruth E's heads were bowed in prayer; their eyes closed. At first they didn't realize the dam was breaking.
Jacey's tears began streaming down her face, the crying becoming audible to a kind of roaring sob decible; Jacey was convulsed in repentance.
The girls held her hands; Ruth E speaking softly. "That's good Jacey. Just cry it all out first. Then we'll talk some more." Jacey cried for more than an hour; loud, gulping sobs. Jacinth had to close the window and curtains against curious villagers. "Don't worry," Jacinth told them, "Jacey will be ok."
The crying was abating, so Ruth E suggested Jacinth make them all some tea and bring it in. Ruth E opened the windows to let the air circulate. She dug into her backpack for tissues and a pad of paper and a pen. Handing the tissues to Jacey, Ruth E said, "Now I believe you need to be specific in your relinquishing of your record of wrongs. I want you to think of as many people as possible whom you feel have wronged you and I'll write the person's name down and their wrong (s) beside the name. You speak; I write.
After that then, one by one, you can tell God, in Jesus name, I forgive so and so for such and such. You have to specifically fill in the blanks. When you have spoken each forgiveness, I want you to take my bright red marker pen and write across the person's name and their wrong against you, FORGIVEN, in big, bold, red capital letters. You think you can do that Jacey? We're here to help you."
"Yes, I believe I can. I already feel like a huge burden is rolling away." Jacey said.
Hours and hours later, the exercise was completed. Jacey's face was beaming. She felt such peace and forgiveness herself. Jacinth was the one crying now-with joy. She'd gotten her twin back.
Jacey's joy started a huge avalanche of warmth cascading all throughout her body. She started to breathe very deeply, she closed her eyes and she rested back against the pillows and fell deeply asleep.
Ruth E felt her pulse rate was slightly rapid but not alarming. "I think she just needs to sleep after all that" said Ruth E to Jacinth. "Since it's 3 or 4 in the morning, why don't we too, lay down and sleep here in the same room with Jacey. If she wakes up, we'll be nearby."
They arranged their mats on the floor and were soon blending their snores with Jacey's.
Part 14
They slept the sleep of exhaustion but woke to the sounds of songs and hymns wafting up from the village church service. Oops, they were going to be terribly late. Ruth E and Jacinth sat up, peered around, sniffed the air and chorused, "Coffee!"
And then, "Who's making coffee?" They turned in unison and stared at the sofa. It was empty. "Jacey?" they said together. They scrambled up and bee-lined to the kitchen. Sure enough Jacey was busy brewing some local coffee and traditional cakes were being fried in a baby-sized wok.
She grinned at their quizzical faces. "Good morning, sleepy heads!" The two girls shook their heads, blinked their eyes, rubbed them some and peered again at Jacey. "What's wrong, girls?" Jacey teased. "Look at what God has done overnight. I can dance. I can sing. I can cook. No painful and stiff joints or muscles. It's amazing what God's amazing grace can do for such a wretch as I have been. Praise the Lord, girls!"
Jacey's exuberance was catchy the more the two woke up and sipped coffee. "Alright! Let's sing Praise God from Whom all blessings flow!"
And they did just that.
Ruth E was certainly amazed. But she was cautious too. There was certainly sincerity in the confessions and repentance but her morning prayers with the twins (they decided not to go to church as they were so late) was to pray against relapse; against pride.
Ruth E had a further couple of exercises that she felt to be crucial; Jacey would have a huge Part 2 to accomplish, and a continuing Part 3. That would be to go to each one as much as possible and seek forgiveness from the individuals she had wronged by her unforgiveness. The cleansing power of the blood of the Lamb would sustain, propel and compel her through every last one. She didn't know what peoples' reactions would be but they would need to be much in prayer before each episode. She needn't go alone if she didn't wish but it was up to her. However it would be a good idea to have someone else along to help with accountability and to be a witness," Ruth E told Jacey and Jacinth. She'd join them as much as possible when she was free. She could surely pray from a distance too" she added.
The third bit of 'homework' would be to jot down in a journal all the things she was thankful and grateful for. Each day, write at least one thing even if it was just, "thankful for coconut milk". At the end of a month she could review and praise the Lord for all those things and be thankful all over again. Joy could well be a result.
Part 15
Ruth E had thought she wouldn't know what to share with Shem in emails. Well now she had a load of things to say, without mentioning names, of course. She'd also include more descriptions of the work the Lord had been allowing her to do over the past many years, since; well since they'd stopped writing years ago. Granted, he'd likely have heard lots of snippets from her parents, Grampy Blue and even, possibly from Great-granny Blue, but now he could hear her perspectives, straight from the horse's mouth, so to speak.
The days turned into weeks, then months; she exited the country, came back; stayed for two weeks and applied for and had gotten another three months. What would happen the next round, she wasn't so sure but she kept reminding herself that God was in control.
So she continued with her nursing and with her little English classes; making friends and leading many to Jesus Christ.
Shem had mentioned a possible visit in one of his emails but she'd dissuaded him. She wasn't quite ready for that sort of thing. That's not the reason she gave, mind you, but that was at the bottom of it. She told him her visa stay was so uncertain and that because she was back and forth it would not be conducive to visits. If he persisted, she'd give him the primary reason.
Besides, she didn't really want folks on the mission field to know anything about Shem as yet. Early days she thought. Her parents and Great-granny Blue, as far as she knew, were the only ones to know they were corresponding, and they'd keep mum. If anything ever came of this, then they all would find out soon enough, as if out of the blue.
~ERC September 2017~
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