Cynical Apples (TT)

 

Like a rotten apple in a basket of apples can infect the whole basketful, so too a cynical person can affect a whole group of people.  Their distrust and self-interest murmuring and complaining, along with their questioning the sincerity of the speaker or giver or helper leaves cynical dust in their wake.  

For instance, should a boss or church member do something good for them or invite them out for a meal, they question the motives.  Disgruntlement can spread like wildfire among a group quicker than one could say a thankful, "thank you" of gratitude.

Deborah Smith Pegue says in her book, 30 Days to Taming YOUR Tongue, that 

"cynicism is venom."

She goes on to say it ...

" ... poisons your spirit and that of others."

We need to be wary of such people of cynical mind and heart.  What's in the heart will come out of the mouth.  Pegue says she finds it best to distance herself from such toxic persons.

This is good advice to protect oneslf from becoming a 'cynical apple' oneself.  However, the thought crossed my mind, "How did this cynical person come to be?  What caused him (or her) to become like this?"

It may be beneficial to draw that person aside from the group to counsel, if they are willing.  Perhaps they will open up to the root cause and seek healing of their soul, spirit and heart.  As these attitudes are generally built up over time into habits, it will take time to unravel and create wholesome habits instead.  So patience may well be needed break down long-standing strongholds.

Like Matthew 18:15-20 instructs, if someone sins against you,

 "go and tell him his fault ... if he listens, you have gained a brother." 

If not you take two or three others and if he still doesn't listen, then he is brought before the church and if he still refuses to listen, then and only then, distance yourself from that brother or sister.  If this is done in a loving and caring manner, positive change may result.  Pray that it does.

No doubt the church setting is different in dynamics from an office setting but the principles of the process may be able to be applied in some form that fits the situation.  If, by the grace of God one finds oneself in a toxic office setting and you can still be the salt and light, may God give you abundant grace and fortify you to persevere with His grace and mercy until such a time things change or He directs you to another place!

Whatever the situation, if the Matthew verses have been applied but there is no change in cynicism, then Psalm 1:1 may well need to be put into effect.

"Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers."

This is the verse Pegues brings to our attention and is wisdom from above.  If the cynical apple can't be removed, then remove the good apples from the cynical one (also Pegues idea).  As in COVID times, remove oneself and distance oneself from that which can infect and affect you, if at all possible.  May our Heavenly Father give you the grace if you cannot.

Heavenly Father, Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven!  There are times and situations You put us in, in order to develop our Christian character, attitudes and the fruit of Your Holy Spirit within us.  Should it be to be plunked down in the midst of cynical people, Lord, HELP US!

We will definitely need it!  Keep us sweet and smiling with the joy of the Lord for as long as it takes.  May we win over the situation with Your grace and love.  Help us to pour it out upon them even as You develop in our own beings that which is needful.  Otherwise, Lord, take us out of and away from them;  give us Your escape route.  In the name of Your Son Jesus we ask.  Amen.

                                                    ~ ERC  May 2025 ~

Based on Psalm 1:1 and Matthew 18:15-20 ESV.  Also loosely based on 30 Days to Taming YOUR Tongue, Day 14 - The Cynical Tongue, by Deborah Smith Pegues.

Sing, What You Are, Speaks So Loud, along with Selah Praise Music.