Discreet & Wise (TT)

 'Discretion,' according to the online dictionary from Oxford Languages, means, 

"the quality of behaving or speaking in such a way as to avoid causing offence or revealing confidential information."

  Secondly, it is 

"the freedom to decide what should be done in a particular situation."

If a person has discretion, the Proverbs writer says it, 

"will watch over you, understanding will guard you" (Proverbs 2:11 ESV).

So how can one develop discretion?  The verses that come before this verse 11 explain it that in a section of my Bible is called, "The Value of Wisdom'.  This wisdom leading to learning discretion comes from receiving and treasuring others' words of wisdom especially from God, although in this proverb's case it could have been King Solomon speaking to his own son.

"Making your ear attentive to wisdom," trains ones heart towards understanding.  Yes, willingness comes from the heart.  Next, since you want to travel this path, you

"call out for insight and...understanding". 

 You seek high and low for this wisdom.  This progresses to understanding, 

"the fear of the Lord and finding knowledge of God."

When we seek for this our mouths will then be able to keep closed or only open with discretion.  There will be greater integrity in the way one conducts ones life and it will guard us like a shield.

This wisdom will not just be head knowledge but will,

"come into your heart and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul" 

(Proverbs 2:10 ESV).

The conclusion is that discretion will watch over you, undersatnding will guard you. (see v 11).

As believers in Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit will also lead and guide us using this wisdom, knowledge and understanding.  It will then,

"[deliver] you from the way of evil, from men of perverted speech" (v 12)

and more as you will see if you continue to read to the end of Proverbs 2.

Kind David's discretion went right out the window when he looked too long at Bathsheba.  He didn't turn aside and allow the wisdom he usually had, deliver him from the forbidden woman (v 16).

Bathesheba wasn't an adulteress in the sense this verse says, "smooth words" as she had been minding her own business.  Although she may have dared to refuse the summons to the palace but she could have feared for her life if she did.  We are not told in Scripture why she didn't or if she did but to no avail.

The onus was on David.  That's why it is so surprizing to me that this leader of a whole nation fell.  Yes, he's human but from his psalms and his rough life story and having been christened by God as, "a man after my own heart," we question, how could this have happened (see 1 Samuel 13:14 and Acts 13:22)!?

He was in the wrong place at the wrong time.  We don't know why he hadn't led his troops to war, where he should have been, so maybe this was the initial show of indiscretion that led to the downfall.

Anyway, leaders are not exempt from temptation and being led astray but the way Nathan the prophet handled the situation was discreet.  He didn't lambast David with self-righteous confrontation but rather told an analogical story.  David got angry and gave judgement on that lamb thief and only then did Nathan say, 

"You are the man" (see 2 Samuel 11 and 12)!

A favorite Bible story of mine is Joseph from the book of Genesis, especially when he gets to Egypt as a slave.  Life really threw him for a loop!  Not that I'm glad he was a slave or in  that loop but the manner in which he conducted himself showed great discretion and wisdom.  He ran away from Potiphar's wife but was still sent to prison.  He was given responsibilities in prison and when called before Pharoah to interpret his dreams, Joseph was then deemed "discreet and wise" and given a most pretigious position, becoming only second to Pharoah (see Genesis 37, 39-41, especially 41:39).

Joseph had matured.  According to Deborah Smith Pegues, in her book 30 Days To Taming YOUR Tongue, she writes, referring to Noah's two sons Shem and Japheth, that their discretion in covering up their father's drunken nakedness,

 "was a sign of their maturity."

Ham had seen that sight and had laughed and talked about it and may even had taken some sort of advantage of his father's state.  Pegues further states,

"Some subject matters should simply be off limits for discussion". 

 I agree.  In fact, recently I have encountered such at a youth camp.  The speaker had used an image in his power point slides that was supposedly subtle but it got the message across but I felt it in poor taste and too graphic for a Christian event.

It felt dirty.  Likely the speaker's intentions were to create a certain message impact but there may have been a better way to have done so - a more discreet and wise way.

Pegues cautions that especially when leaders go astray, to not to "cover up," but to "cover with," such as the case of David and Nathan, as seen above.

Discretion is called for.  She says, 

"Confront with love and compassion" 

and to remember that someday you may be in that same boat of 'nakedness' and wish that discreet leaders would indeed handle the situation with discretion rather than indiscretion.

Lord, help us to tame our tongues in this area of discretion, to know when and how to speak and what to say at the right time.  May we too become discreet and wise through the wisdom, knowledge and understanding that comes only from You and as led by Your Holy Spirit.  I ask in Your name, amen.

                                                     ~ ERC  July 2025 ~

Based on Proverbs 2:1-12, esp vs 11 (ESV).  Also, 30 Days To Taming YOUR Tongue, Day 29 - The Indiscreet Tongue, by Deborah Smith Pegues.

Sing, Spirit Leads Me, along with Hillsong, and Lead Me to the Cross, also with Hillsong UNITED.